In our hunt for
change we are challenging ourselves each day to do just that. We’ve created the ideal cauldron for such
transformation. Two adults, one almost
teen girl, and one toddler in a 16 foot trailer, shake and stir and et voila:
change, or boil in the fire of intimacy.
Accept, because resistance is futile.
Here we are 6 days
into our journey and facing some of the challenges we foresaw, yet they looked so
much easier from our couch in our spacious home. Falling asleep inches away from my husband
and baby with my step-daughter hovering a foot and a half above us. Waking up inches from my husband and baby
with my step daughter hovering a foot and a half above us. Eating elbow to elbow, toe to toe.
Or we are in the
truck, a more compact version of our sleeping and eating formations.
You get the
idea.
We are knotted
together, and sometimes the knots feel cozy and safe and heart nourishing. Other times it feels scratchy against my
skin, irritating with every flex of us.
We are becoming one animal, one body of movement synchronized by 4
bodies swaying in and out of rhythms.
When we are synced, there is laughter, graceful anticipation of needs
and wants, and an overall joy of being together.
The yoke that binds
then feels like a satin nest.
We have travelled
north from Sebastopol, our first stop being a dear friends home near
Garberville. We stayed 3 nights with
Bays God Momma Alison where we got to play in the Eel river, wander through
redwoods and discover our trailer legs.
Having our first stop be one of my best friends was like a soft opening,
we got to land, and have the loving support of Alison before jumping all the
way in the deep end.
And as it turns
out, the deep end is gorgeous.
Yesterday we hiked
from our camp spot at Patricks Point, winding through coastal forest laced in
wild flowers whose purple and yellow blossoms were spread wide under a warm
July sun. Like grand altars to forgotten
gods huge stone precipices loomed out over the sea, as we climbed one I brought
up the rear and used that to sneak off on a side trail. I wound around the pillar until I was perched
hundreds of feet over the crashing waves nestled into stone and surrounded by
delicate purple blooms.
Alone in this nest
I felt the freedom that gets churned to life on lengthy adventures. I felt the stack of my daily concerns that
have cemented my shoulders and neck fall away.
I felt the tremendous weight of my modern life and sang it off of my
bones.
I gave myself the
time and space to sit and slow down without any anxiety of how I should be a
mother, wife or busily doing person, I waited until that wave crashed all the
way. When I got up, I was lighter,
softer, and my breath came fuller. I am
grateful for the spot over the sea.
I climbed the rest
of Wedding Rock to find my family perched and my son covered in dirt smiling as
he joyfully climbed all the rocks he could get his little legs to gain purchase
on.
These are our days
now. We were driving to Oregon today,
that was the plan. But a camp site
caught our eye and here we are in Mill River. As soon as we got settled (which takes about
7 minutes with the trailer) we wandered into the wilderness. We followed the 19 month old through a
hollowed and fell redwood to a dried riverbed where we made fairy boats to
float in the remaining pools.
We are sliding into
a fiercely sweet rhythm, and I am grateful.
💕Yay!💕
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